Tonya Jean: Grandma

We are on grandma watch. This woman is 102 years old. She is ready to go and we, I believe, are ready to let her. It does not change the fact that this is gonna hurt. This woman was so important to me and all my family. She would smile as she would look at my grandpa, as they watched all 15 of us grandchildren and say, "Look what we did. Look what we started."

Gertie

Johnny

I am very proud to be her granddaughter. At the end, I wanted to tell her about my chickens. She had chickens, we could talk chickens. I wanted to show her my garden and discuss how to make sure the tomatoes don't split. I want to complain about quilt corners and my mother. I wanted to have all those conversations one more time. I hope she looks down sees where she is in my life; how she is a part of who I am. I can only hope she is proud of me.

Her graduation picture.

****

I got the call on Saturday that she passed. I immediately flew home, memories replaying though my mind. Once, when my (best) cousin Sharon and I were little, maybe 5 years old, we were somehow left to our own devices and decided to make Christmas cookies in the bathroom. The recipe for bathroom Christmas cookies, you ask? Unroll a wad of toilet paper -at least 15 squares, drop it in the toilet, collect soaked tissue with your bare hands, set soaking wad on the bathtub rim and sit on it for 5-10 seconds. When properly squashed, take flattened, wet cookie and stick it in a slapping style to the wall. May require an additional toilet dipping. We had quite a production going until my other cousin, Kim, came in and with shock and disbelief she cried, 'Tonya and Sharon!" putting an end to our operation.

Another great thing about grandma was nothing we did was ever wrong. She laughed then and every time she retold the story.

Sharon with the Lay An Egg game (funny enough, we got in trouble with that game another time.)

I'd call her bitching about my mom and she'd never take the bait. Not once. She listened and she got me past whatever the hell it was that I was pissed about, without one word against anyone. One time I called complaining because I was pregnant and my husband was deployed (6 months, he says 5 and an half) the other 2 kids were, I don't know, just being kids I guess, but in the "let's be destructive" kind of way. I was tired and tired of doing it by myself. She listened and when I was done she didn't say anything. I, confused with the silence, wanted her to join my pity party. So, I said, "And tomorrow I have to do it all over again." More silence so, I added, "I have to do it alone for the next 3 months." She said, "Well, what else are you going do?" My turn to be silent. Oh crap. She was right. What else could I do but buck up and handle my shit. She also mentioned how his job was important so complaining to him would not be a good idea. She was one tough cookie.

While there, I saw a lot of old pictures, look at my dad in the Navy. What a hunk.

Here is a couple more. I had to steal them from the video and since my I.T person is at a sleep over, I have to apologize. My grandma... man, I can't even tell you, my words seem lame compared to the light she was. An amazing woman has gone.

Tractor rides every visit

My brother feeding the hogs

She made cakes

My uncle Vernon.
He died in a car accident when he was 16.

The significance of the next picture is that every dog they had was named Spits. If a dog "disappeared" they told us it ran off with a pack of wild dogs. Look at these dogs...every one more different than the other, all named Spits.